If you are like me, starting to write that first page of a new novel can be a daunting prospect. But that’s just me.
Having researched, plotted and prepared a detailed outline, I am finally ready to sit down, pen in hand, and get on with the writing, trying to forget the fact that I’ll be staring at this pad for the next six months or so. Nevertheless, I am all worked up, full of buzz, with too many scenes competing to be first. That’s when it hits me. After hours of gazing at the empty page, my thoughts on everything except the task at hand, I am forced to give up and walk away in disgust, or grasp any feeble excuse to do something else—like mowing the lawn, or doing the shopping—promising myself I would get back to it with renewed determination and energy.
Eventually, of course, the writing urge and pent-up pressure to create will overwhelm me and I will finally start to write, relieved that the intervening procrastination has ended. Once I get going, everything is fine—mostly—and I soon forget the preceding agonies—until I am ready to begin my next book. So, what is going here?
I can only speak from my own experience, and I will avoid pontificating by making grandiose psychological diagnoses. After all, each writer is different, and approaches that first manuscript page in his or her own way. Having written a stack of books, I’ve had lots of time to ponder the what’s going on question, and I’ve come with several revealing conclusions about myself and how I start to write. They help me understand, but not necessarily avoid the phenomenon.
After jotting down the initial book outline, fleshing out the idea bubble that gave rise to the whole thing, I am faced with what is usually a protracted period of heavy research. I want to ensure my books are realistic and are sprinkled with necessary detail that will immerse the reader into a scene, making him feel he is actually there. That’s just me. Many writers don’t bother, and still produce eminently readable books. The thing is, having finished my research, I am somewhat drained and need to recharge. Relieved that I have all the background material, I am emotionally ready to tackle that first page, but in reality, I don’t have the energy. There is also a matter of having to write a detailed outline now. More pain. I think you get the picture. A glass of nice bourbon can help here a lot.
There is also a matter of getting everything properly sorted out in my mind before I can charge into that first page, a process that can take some time. You would think my detailed outline would have done that by now, and to a certain extent it has. But…the outline only gives me the sequence of events within the book. It doesn’t help me with how I will write the damned thing. It doesn’t tell me whether I should start the first paragraph as a narrative, dialogue, an action sequence, or with something cuddly. That’s what drives me to distraction, and until I sort it out, I cannot put those first words down on paper.
I have heard authors say that they just start, that’s all; writing down words and scenes as they come to mind, and worry about how it all hangs together later. Okay, that might work for them, but I’m different. And yes, I was told a few times that I’m different—for a number of reasons, not all of them exactly complementary. But that’s another story. Me? Before I can write down that first word, sentence and paragraph, I must be fully immersed in the scene, totally comfortable with the characters, their personality and behavior. The whole thing must fit snugly like an old glove. Only then am I ready to write.
There is, of course, another explanation, and I hesitate to mention it, revealing myself to be someone ordinary and fallible. Writing is tough work, something many people don’t appreciate. After all, who is prepared to spend hours at a time, alone in a small room with nothing but a computer, writing pad, shelves of books, perhaps a distracting CD player for company, shunning family, friends, and the rest of mankind simply to create words? Writers must be crazy, which means I’m a little bent as well. And because writing is such hard work, promising insomnia, long days and nights, endless editing, it is no wonder I don’t want to start!
How do you cope?
